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Real members of myHIVteam have posted questions and answers that support our community guidelines, and should not be taken as medical advice. Looking for the latest medically reviewed content by doctors and experts? Visit our resource section.

What's The Best Way To Tell Family And Friends Of Your HIV Status?

A myHIVteam Member asked a question 💭
Chatham, ON

Would you tell them individually, at gatherings or all at once using social media?

April 12, 2018
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A myHIVteam Member

HIV is a personal diagnosis. Each of us have our own way of speaking to family and friends. Are you comfortable with yourself being a PLWH (person living with HIV), or uncomfortable? Are you trustful of those you inform? Does trust get in the way? Does trust matter to you? I have found living in this world, there are few people I am trustful in sharing my story, as it is over 33 years long. I’m a long-term survivor and not sure why I have lived as long as I have with this diagnosis, but continue to do so today. It is equivalent to coming out all over again and I am not sure that is what I want to un-closet for all to know. Those who have gone before us, were strong, brave, and will always be in our hearts. A second time of coming out isn’t an easy decision for anyone. Others, have made it their goal to make it known to all. The only advice I can give is this: do what you are comfortable with. I’m not comfortable sharing my story with everyone (via social media), but then maybe later I will as the stigma unfolds. Saving the next generation from HIV by discovering the vaccine that has proven to be unending, but eventually inevitable, is the best goal mankind can ever achieve. Stay healthy, swallow your meds, and treat others like you would like to be treated. Empathy is a beautiful way of living, but not all humans possess it. Being a PLWH shouldn’t matter, but unfortunately for most of humanity, it does. The stigma lives on, and it has no empathy for us living HIV.

Now do this for yourself:

In my last 2 sentences,
substitute “PLWH” with LGBTQIN, and “HIV” with OUT AND PROUD.

Stigma will always be against us no matter your sexuality or your status. Remember, this is about you, not anyone else.

December 5, 2019
A myHIVteam Member

Tell immediate family one on one starting with the one you're closest to. Extended family in my opinion it's not their damned business. As far as friends go be very selective who you tell, some folks like to gossip.

April 18, 2018
A myHIVteam Member

Well Dezell, good luck with that. From what I've seen & I've seen a lot, family gathering are the worst times too announce your status. I won't list my reasons for saying that, after all it's your choice, not mine. Good Luck.
Kevin

April 13, 2018
A myHIVteam Member

When I told my Mother, I told her directly,since I knew she would never reject me. Since my Dad disliked me anyway, I let Mama take care of the dissemination of this news

April 13, 2018
A myHIVteam Member

I my opinion, you should do it face too face, one on one with family. Start with the family member who you think will react the WORST, that way it will only get easier from there.

April 13, 2018

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